Sunday, July 22, 2018

The Guessing Game - Updated

What will be on the cover of People this week? My guesses:

Issue dated July 30, 2018 (Note: this is Us Weekly, not People.)
Us cover July 30, 2018

Meghan, the Duchess of Sussex: In a cover story (above,) Us Weekly is reporting that she's coming to America for a private visit this Fall. Although the magazine cover refers to "their first official tour of Meghan's homeland," implying that Harry and Meghan are both coming, the online story says she's traveling solo. Given that sloppiness, and the thinness of the reporting, which quotes only an unnamed "source," I'm betting that this story is a tabloid fantasy. (Harry and Meghan are officially visiting Australia in October to attend the Invictus Games.) Meghan's family is also still in the spotlight, with reports that her ridiculous half-sister is in talks to appear on the U.K. version of Celebrity Big Brother (read about it here,) and her half-brother's fiancee was apparently arrested for assault (read about that here)
Prince George: Today (Sunday) is his 5th birthday, the palace released a cute new picture. The whole Cambridge family is vacationing with Kate's parents on the island of Mustique
Jinger Duggar: Gave birth. I fervently hope People continues their recent pattern of *not* featuring anyone from this family on the cover
Kimberly Guilfoyle: Don Jr.'s girlfriend is leaving Fox News, possibly not by choice, she may be joining America First, a pro-Trump PAC
Tom Cruise: Mission Impossible: Fallout opens Friday
Roseanne Barr: An unhinged rant on YouTube
Karen McDougal: The Playboy model who had an affair with Donald Trump is back in the news. It's something about the president's previous lawyer, Michael Cohen, secretly recording a conversation with Donald before he was president. Those tapes are apparently now in the hands of the FBI
Michael Strahan and Sara Haines: Spinning off to a third hour of GMA?
The Coleman Family: 9 members of the family died in a duck boat accident in Missouri
The LA Hostage Stand-off: A man held hostages in a Los Angeles Trader Joe's Saturday night after shooting his grandmother. He killed a store manager and wounded several others. I don't think People will put his name or picture on the cover, but they may cover the story
Corinne Olympios: The Bachelor alum was pranked by Sacha Baron Cohen (read about it here)
Bristol Palin: Apparently she's joining the cast of Teen Mom OG (read about it here,) which is a little strange given that Bristol is now 27 and has three kids. (Is she still married to Dakota Meyer? It was reported that he had filed for divorce a few months ago, then I saw a story that said they're back together. Are they? Not sure, don't care.) Mom Sarah Palin told TMZ that Bristol's not doing this to achieve reality TV stardom, oh, no, no, no. She's doing it to "help people in a hurtin' world." How going on a reality show about pregnant teenagers helps anyone other than Bristol herself, who will get a paycheck for her trouble, I don't really understand, but whatever. If my count is correct, this is the eighth reality show Sarah and/or a member of her family has appeared on. Can you name them? If not, here's a reminder:

Sarah Palin's Alaska (the whole family)
Stars Earn Stripes (Todd)
Dancing With The Stars (Bristol, with Todd and Sarah in the audience)
Life's A Tripp (Bristol)
Amazing America with Sarah Palin (On the Sportsman Channel)
Celebrity Wife Swap (Bristol and Willow)
Dancing With The Stars All Stars (Bristol)

There was talk that Sarah was developing some kind of legal show, similar to Judge Judy, but I read that the brave souls in the focus group who watched the pilot pretty much laughed Palin out of the room, and that was the end of that. I said once, in a post years ago, that Sarah Palin probably lies awake nights trying to figure out how to turn her family into the Kardashians. Clearly, she's still trying. 

Tuesday morning update: I said above that the Trader Joe's hostage-taker killed a store manager. Now CNN is reporting that she was actually killed by a bullet from a police officer's gun:

As Atkins fled in his grandmother's car, he fired shots out the back window toward pursuing officers, police said. Authorities said the teen he kidnapped was shot in the head but survived.

Officers did not fire at the gunman during the chase. But after Atkins crashed the car outside a Trader Joe's and continued shooting at police, officers returned fire, Moore said.

As Atkins fled into the Trader Joe's, Corado was exiting the grocery store, police said. That's when Corado was struck by LAPD gunfire. (Read the story here.)


Update #2: Model Karlie Kloss is engaged to a man named Joshua Kushner, who just happens to be the younger brother of presidential son-in-law Jared Kushner. It was just announced this morning, which probably makes it too late for this week's new cover, so hold that thought for next week. This is a high-wattage merger of politics and pop culture; my guess is that stories about it will be everywhere. (Read People's online story here.) 

Stories that appear on the cover of this week's issue will be highlighted in green. 

Wednesday morning, update #3: See the new cover, with Tom Cruise as the main story, here.

One more thing: Apologies for the strange spacing in this post. It happens sometimes when I cut-and-paste from other websites. I'm trying to learn how to fix it. 

Update #4, on August 3: Bristol Palin has announced that she is "freshly divorced." The Washington Post ran a short story, read it here

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