Because You Know I Like Magazine Covers

Mid-morning update: Yes, the president does golf a lot.

Issue dated April 10, 2017



Original post:
The April 1-7, 2017 issue of The Economist magazine:

This Day In History, 1981: President Reagan Is Shot

I was at home, sick with the flu or something, ensconced on the couch and ready to watch a couple of soap operas. Ryan's Hope and All My Children, to be specific. (It was about 2.30 p.m. in Washington, D.C., 11.30 a.m. on the west coast, where I was.) Then this happened:

March, 1981 was only 17 1/2 years since President Kennedy's assassination and just 13 years since Martin Luther King and RFK were shot. President Ford had been shot at on two occasions in 1975. At the time it seemed very plausible that the president could be killed by gunfire. (In the clip reporter Frank Reynolds keeps saying that the president hadn't been hit, but his initial information was inaccurate. President Reagan was hit and seriously wounded by the bullet.) 

On the other hand, 1981 was 20 years before 9/11 and in those more innocent days, we didn't automatically assume an event like this was politically-motivated terrorism, and it turns out it wasn't. A mentally-ill loner named John Hinckley shot the president trying to gain the attention and favor of actress Jodie Foster, who was at that time a student at Yale. (Note that Hinckley was an affluent white American whose family was socially connected to the Bushes. In fact, Hinckley's older brother Scott was scheduled to have dinner with Neil Bush, son of then-Vice President George H.W. Bush, the night following the shooting. After the shooting, the dinner was cancelled.)   

In the 36 years since President Reagan was shot, things have happened in our country and the world that would have been unimaginable at that time. For what it's worth, however, at least as far as I'm aware, no one has taken a shot at a president.

Note: I often say that #EditorsAreImportant and I could have used one yesterday. I misspelled the shooter's name as "Hinkley." The correct spelling is Hinckley and I've corrected the post. 

More HGTV: The Property Brothers

Issue dated April 10, 2017: Property Brothers


For the third time in five months, People features HGTV stars as the main cover story, which I didn't foresee. They've got a book coming out but not until September. Only one of my guesses this week made it to the cover, Christina El Moussa, also from HGTV, and her "revenge body." Yuck.

I'm most interested in potential princess Meghan Markle's story but just like last week's Brad Pitt item, the story currently posted at people.com (read it here) is bland and uncontroversial. Markle's "untold story" is that her friends (People's "sources") say she's "cool and down to earth," with a "wonderful warmth" and a "bright smile." Wow, good thing that story didn't remain untold.

The Guessing Game

Update #3:
Abby Lee Miller: Quits Dance Moms, under investigation for fraud
Darlene Cates: Star of What's Eating Gilbert Grape dies

Tuesday morning update #2:
Michelle Pfeiffer: Back in the spotlight with new movies and the cover of Interview magazine

Monday mid-morning, update #1:
Kim Kardashian: Baby #3?
Rachel Dolezal: Releasing a memoir
Samira Wiley and Lauren Morelli: Orange is the New Black stars got married

Original post:
What will be the cover story on People this week? My guesses:

London Terror Attack: The victims
Missing Black Girls: In Washington D.C. area
Trump Kids: Spring Break in Aspen
Elton John: 70th birthday party
Rob Lowe: A new show with his kids
Jon Gosselin: A new job as a stripper. Really. I can't imagine anyone cares about this but People does run Gosselin stories periodically.
The Bachelor: 15th anniversary
Antonio Banderas: Recovering from a heart attack
Christina El Moussa: On-line body shaming
Chuck Barris: Dead Celebrity. He created The Gong Show
Debbie Reynolds and Carrie Fisher: A public memorial

This Day In History, 2002: The Bachelor Premiere

March 25, 2002, a Monday night. If you're like me, you weren't watching The Bachelor and if you're like me, you also had no idea what ABC had unleashed upon the world that night. I said a few posts ago that very, very few shows, in any genre, last 15 years, and The Bachelor has not just lasted, but thrived and expanded. The Bachelorette. Bachelor Pad. Bachelor in Paradise. Happily Ever After. Wow.

For those of you who care about such things, filming of Rachel's season is right on schedule and one lucky contestant got to ride horses with our Bach'ette:

Giddyup!!! #TheBachelorette pic.twitter.com/Np4fxRPGwI

— Mike Fleiss (@fleissmeister) March 23, 2017

Rose ceremony #3 is tonight. Will we still be talking about The Bachelor in 15 years? No way to know but the way things are going, I'm not betting against it.

Jared Was Skiing

In my most recent Guessing Game post, I mused about rivalries between Trump's kids:

Ivanka and Jared are now both right there in the White House, "advising" Dad and hobnobbing with world leaders like Angela Merkel and the Prime Minister of Japan. We see pictures of their kids boarding Marine One. Donald Jr. and Eric are banished and have to stay away to run the business. Plus, their financial situations are different. If anything ever happens to The Donald, Ivanka will still be married to a very rich man. Her husband is just as rich, or possibly richer, than her father. The boys? Not so much. Fascinating.

Now it turns out that neither Ivanka nor Jared were around to advise the president during the healthcare debacle, and POTUS isn't happy: 

Trump unhappy Jared Kushner took a powder on the ski slopes as health care bill floundered - CNN https://t.co/QhFgSmIh9p

— Jake Tapper (@jaketapper) March 24, 2017

Looks like living the glamorous jetset lifestyle you're entitled to when you're (more or less) a billionaire can sometimes interfere with being the adored favorite child (or son-in-law) of a self-absorbed, narcissistic bombastic not-too-bright manchild. To top it all off, Ivanka and Jared's neighbors in Kalorama are not happy about the disruption to their neighborhood:

“Are you kidding me?” asked Marti Robinson, a trial attorney who lives across the street. “This is the adult child of the president. Sometimes there are 10 cars out here.”

Metal barricades along Tracy Place and Kalorama Road now make it impossible for pedestrians to use the sidewalk bordering the house. Neighbors talk of clusters of Secret Service agents lingering on the pavement, conversing in loud voices and even changing their shirts in public view.

“They’ve completely taken over the whole street — as if they have the authority!” said Robinson, an Obama appointee to the U.S. Product Safety Commission. (Read the Washington Post story here.) 

Word Of The Day: Ignominious

📈Lookups for 'ignominious' are up 4,695% after Jake Tapper used the word to describe the failed ACA repeal. https://t.co/lZJJZzYgg5

— Merriam-Webster (@MerriamWebster) March 24, 2017

Ignominious: adj., dishonorable, despicable, humiliating, degrading. (From my Merriam-Webster Dictionary.)

I love that people took to the dictionary when they heard a word they don't know. For the record, I do know the word and used it in a post on October 23, and for the record, my usage was correct. Unfortunately the expectation I expressed, which was that Donald Trump was going to go down in "ignominious, historic defeat," was extremely incorrect. (Read it here.)

Tweeting The Trump

pic.twitter.com/7TsqZYf4NE

— Katy Tur (@KatyTurNBC) March 23, 2017

I don't have the words to adequately express how dismaying this is. These photos are from yesterday, when the president apparently didn't have anything better do, even as a tiny little vote was scheduled to take place in the House of Representatives. In the end the vote didn't happen yesterday, and as I'm writing just past noon on Friday, still hasn't.

Good Advice

With today's unnerving events in London, some things to keep in mind about media coverage and information in general:

A New 'Do?

AP photo

Once again the hair looks different -- combed straight back with some kind of layered thing at the crown, plus, for that extra je ne sais quoi, the highly gelled curvy part sticking out behind his ear. In the midst of a bad week, perhaps POTUS isn't thinking too much about his hair, but still. This is one for the memory book.

This Day In History: 1930 And 1948

Wednesday afternoon update: To boldly go... Turns out today is Captain Kirk's (i.e., William Shatner's) birthday too. Warmest birthday wishes to all!

Original post:
March 22 has been a good day for musical geniuses. Happy Birthday to Stephen Sondheim and Andrew Lloyd Webber!

Happiest of birthdays to the man behind the music, the glitz and the glamour, @OfficialALW. #SunsetBoulevard pic.twitter.com/J1aUa3bX0n

— Sunset Boulevard (@sunsetblvd) March 22, 2017

Happy Birthday, Stephen Sondheim! In 1965, Sondheim wrote DO I HEAR A WALTZ? with Richard Rodgers and Arthur Laurents! Retweet to celebrate! pic.twitter.com/I1P4BflPCK

— Rodgers&Hammerstein (@RnH_Org) March 22, 2017

Where Is Richard Simmons?

Mid-morning update: I was right about the Brad Pitt story. The story currently posted at people.com (and labeled "Exclusive," wow) is bland and generic, featuring quotes from a "source," a "Pitt insider" and an old interview Angelina gave to ABC News:

Six months since Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie‘s split last September, the two are making peace — and have talked to each other directly, sources tell PEOPLE in the new issue.

“He’s much happier,” a source says. “He’s very relieved that things are not playing out in public anymore.”

…“It was a rough time, but they were able to resolve it,” adds the source. “This is a work in progress.”

Jolie even recently told ABC she thought Pitt was a “wonderful” father to their six children.

“He’s always been extremely positive about how Angie’s a good mother, and the goal was to resolve everything for the kids and the whole family, and they’re working toward that,” says the source.

…“He is spending more time with the kids when they are in L.A.,” says another Pitt insider. “He has even spent some time with Maddox and Pax. Things are definitely calming down.” Read the article here. 

So how, exactly, did they "make peace?" By talking to each other.

Original post:
Issue dated April 3, 2017: Richard Simmons


"Will and Kate in Paris" is the only item from this week's Guessing Game post that actually made it to the cover, and apparently People decided not to focus on the controversy around William's ski vacation and dancing video. They also completely ignored Dead Celebrity Chuck Berry. Simmons was on the list two weeks ago and Savannah the week before that. The teaser story about Simmons at people.com features this blast from the past, a vintage cover dated July 10, 1982:



(Note that I'm not "techy" enough to fix whatever programming info is causing the covers to post differently.)

Finally, I'll admit I'm curious about "BRAD'S LIFE NOW," but I'll bet People's story has almost no credible info about how he and Angie "finally made peace."

Tweeting The Trump

This one's actually from Trump, or at least from one of the people who work for him. (As a general rule, tweets from @POTUS are written by staff, tweets from @realDonaldTrump are from the man himself.) Regardless, it's got his name, or at least his title and his picture on it, and not to put too fine a point on it, aeronautics and agriculture really aren't the same thing.

Honored to sign S.442 today. With this legislation, we support @NASA's scientists, engineers, and astronauts in their pursuit of discovery! pic.twitter.com/XNFcsnZkOL

— President Trump (@POTUS) March 21, 2017

The Guessing Game

Tuesday morning update #3:
Bonner Bolton: That is all.

Tuesday morning update #2:
Princess Diana: A new book coming out from author Sally Bedell Smith, in which she says Prince Charles "cried" the night before his wedding to Diana. In this 20th anniversary year I expect multiple stories about all things Diana.
Ivanka Trump: Getting her own White House office. If People wants to get juicy, they should tee up a story about the rivalries between the Trump children. Ivanka and Jared are now both right there in the White House, "advising" Dad and hobnobbing with world leaders like Angela Merkel and the Prime Minister of Japan. We see pictures of their kids boarding Marine One. Donald Jr. and Eric are banished and have to stay away to run the business. Plus, their financial situations are different. If anything ever happens to The Donald, Ivanka will still be married to a very rich man. Her husband is just as rich, or possibly richer, than her father. The boys? Not so much. Fascinating.



Monday morning update #1: A few more guesses:
Kim Kardashian: She's talking about the robbery
Mike Aktari: I'd never heard of him, he was on a reality show called Jerseylicious and died at age 28
Beauty And The Beast: A big opening week-end for the new live-action version
Dancing With The Stars: Season 24 starts tonight, it's the 400th episode
"The Twins": If People's still got The Bachelor on the brain, they may feature twins Emily and Haley Ferguson, who competed on Ben Higgins' season and are now starring in Season 2 of Bach spin-off "Happily Ever After."
Tom Brady's Super Bowl jersey: It's been found.
Eric Trump: Expecting a baby

Original post:
What will be the cover story on People magazine this week? My guesses:


photo credit: Sean Zanni via Getty Images

Ivana Trump: Ex-wife #1, writing a memoir about raising mini-mes #1, 2 and 3, scheduled to be published in September
Chuck Berry: Dead Celebrity. Rock and Roll pioneer dies at age 90
Josh Duggar: Two years after the scandal, he and his wife are expecting #5 (my usual comment about the Duggars: ick)
Mama June Shannon: Weight loss and makeover
J-Rod: Jennifer Lopez and Alex Rodriquez are dating
Will and Kate: An official visit to Paris, he's taking heat for not working hard enough
Rob Kardashian and Blac Chyna: Whatever

And They're Off!

Filming for Rachel's Bach'ette season started last night, which means that some number of men have already been sent home brokenhearted. Bach guru Mike Fleiss tweeted out this picture:

Dudes... #TheBachelorette pic.twitter.com/Fh6mkL79gF

— Mike Fleiss (@fleissmeister) March 17, 2017

Blogging The Bach: As Famous As I Wanna Be

Thursday morning update: Is Luke Pell still mad that he wasn't chosen to be The Bachelor? Sounds like it:

In a new interview with [InTouch magazine,] Pell — who competed for JoJo Fletcher's heart on the Bachelorette Season 12 — may have taken shots at Viall's reality show performance. "I definitely would have made a better Bachelor,” Pell told InTouch. "I’m one of the most genuine and honest people.”

As you may recall, Pell was a fan-favorite who was all set to be the next Bachelor until he reportedly was nixed for Viall. Last year, he claimed to Us Weekly that he was the original choice and even had his bags packed when he got a call from the producers. It's why you can't blame Pell for being a little anti-Viall, but is this self-proclaimed genuine and honest guy really trying to start something with the most recent Bachelor?

Well, in the interview with InTouch, Pell admitted he hadn't watched the show but said, “Based on the unsolicited feedback I’ve gotten from people, this season has been terrible." He also reportedly didn't believe that Viall, who ended up proposing to Vanessa Grimaldi, was actually in it for love, but for the fame. "He could have ended this season and [gone back to a normal life]," Pell said, "but instead he chose to do the most narcissistic thing you can do, which is Dancing With the Stars. I think that makes a statement.” (Read the article at bustle.com here.)

Original post:


I started writing this post Tuesday morning and here's what I wrote on the first "morning after":
This is it, Rosebuds, Nick's biggest moment in the spotlight. Yes, he's been getting a lot of attention throughout his season, but the "morning after" is as bright as it gets when you're The Bachelor. As of this morning, the following stories are currently posted at People.com:

Nick Viall Opens Up about 'Emotional Roller Coaster' Proposal to Vanessa Grimaldi: 'It Was Worth All The Tears'
Bachelor Nation Isn't so Sure About Nick & Vanessa's 'Awkward' Interview: 'This Is All Making Me Very Uncomfortable'
The Bachelor's Nick Viall and His Fiancee on the Pressures to Make Things Work: 'We Have a Long Way to Go'
Nick Viall and Vanessa Grimaldi Go Instagram Official with Super Hot Engagement Selfie
The Bachelor's Nick Viall and Vanessa Grimaldi Explain Why They're Waiting to Wed
The Bachelor's Nick and Vanessa Discuss Their Big News (video)
Nick and Vanessa Respond to Criticism from Bachelor Nation: 'You Can Never Make People Happy'
Nick Viall Says Vanessa Grimaldi Was Always the One: I Measured Every Other Girl Up to Her

And it's not just about Nick and Vanessa. Runner-up Raven gets a story:
What Really Happened Between Nick Viall and Raven Gates in the Fantasy Suite? 'The Show Pretty Much Captured It,' She Says

Vanessa's ring gets a story (and that's a graphic of it above):
All the Details on the 'Massive' 3.75-Carat Engagement Ring The Bachelor's Nick Viall Gave Vanessa Grimaldi

Vanessa's dress gets a story: 

You Can't Marry The Bachelor's Nick Viall, But You Can Rent Vanessa Grimaldi's Winning Dress

Even ex-Bach Chris Soules gets a story:
Former Bachelor Chris Soules Says Finding Love Has Been 'Really Hard' -- But 'It's Just a Matter of Time'

In spite of all this saturation-level coverage of the big finale, the new cover, presumably featuring Nick and Vanessa, isn't posted yet and I'm wondering if perhaps they've been bumped off the cover, or at least downgraded to a smaller, "sidebar" story. With all the information available on the website this morning, what could possibly be left for the actual cover story? According to Reality Steve, Nick and Vanessa's cover shoot took place on Friday, but that doesn't guarantee they'll actually be the main cover story. As soon as the new cover shows up on People.com, I'll post it here.

And with that, I'm officially over Nick, at least until the big break-up announcement comes. (Soules and Whitney Bischoff were over by May 28th of their year, less than three months after their big finale aired. My guess: Nick and Vanessa also won't make it to June 1.)

Now let's talk about Rachel! I confess that I didn't watch After The Final Rose last night, and I fast-forwarded through most of it this morning until I got to Rachel's grand entrance. ABC may be ready to break-up with Nick and Vanessa too, as evidenced by that fact that by 9.35 p.m. Central Time as the show aired live, Nick and Vanessa were done. The rest of the show was devoted to Rachel. Did you notice the serious charisma gap between Nick/Vanessa and Rachel? ABC has a star with their new Bachelorette!

That's as far as I got yesterday. Now I'm back on Wednesday morning and my hunch was right. Nick and Vanessa are only a sidebar on the new cover:

Issue dated March 27, 2017: Prince's Ex-Wife


I wonder if the happy couple knew in advance that they wouldn't be the main story. I further wonder if they're disappointed and possibly pissed off as well. (Imagine getting up this morning and racing to people.com expecting to see your own smiling face on the cover of People magazine, only to end up staring at a musician who's been dead for almost a year.) Every newly engaged Bach couple since Jason M in 2009, except for Ben F and Courtney, has gotten the full cover story treatment. (See those covers here.) Nick and Vanessa didn't even get bumped for a breaking news story. Presumably Prince's ex-wife's new book could have been saved for next week, so I am wondering, what's the real story? Given the online coverage yesterday, Nick and all things Bachelor are big news in People-land, apparently just not big enough for the main cover story. Strange.

Finally, for now, there's a Rachel story at people.com too:

A Bachelor Nation First! New Bachelorette Rachel Lindsay Meets a Few of Her Suitors on After The Final Rose

I never liked Nick much and his season was bleh, so much so that if I wasn't intrigued by Rachel as The Bachelorette I might kiss this show good-bye altogether. More to say about that soon, Rosebuds.

Blogging The Bach: Boring

Update #3: I saw an interview with Luke Pell, who came in 4th on JoJo's season and was passed over for the Bachelor job. He says he would absolutely date Rachel, which makes me think maybe the show is bringing back one or more contestants from previous shows for Rachel's season. As I've said here before, I'm sure there are several alums out there who are trying to figure out how to "pull a Nick" and get another shot at the starring role. Maybe they're getting the band back together?

Sunday morning, update #2: Bach guru Mike Fleiss says something "historic" will be announced on Monday's Finale/After The Final Rose show:

Monday's live season finale is going to be historic!!! Believe me... #thebachelor

— Mike Fleiss (@fleissmeister) March 8, 2017

They've already announced Rachel as the first African-American Bachelorette, so what can possibly be coming next? When they've teased the finale in the past the first guess is always a wedding. Will the newly engaged couple get married right then and there? It's never happened before and almost certainly won't happen this time either. So what's the big announcement? My guesses right now are that they're moving Bach'ette filming to Dallas, Rachel's hometown, or possibly the entire cast of Rachel's season will be black men. Beyond that, who knows?

Actually, Reality Steve says he knows:

For all those asking what this "historic" announcement at ATFR will be, I'll fill you in on Monday. It's definitely something...

— RealitySteve (@RealitySteve) March 11, 2017

We'll see.

Update #1: I meant to include current Instagram numbers for the final four:

Corinne: 520,000
Vanessa: 457,000
Raven: 406,000
Rachel: 284,000

Original post:
Yes, Rosebuds, I am so over Nick and his season. In the second half of the Fantasy Suites dates, Raven either did or did not have the big O, Rachel was eliminated, no surprise, and Vanessa has some doubts. Blah, blah, blah. Finland looked gorgeous and very cold. Very, very cold. For my money, a warm tropical setting, with everyone in swimsuits and flip flops, is so much more romantic than the top of the world covered in snow and ice. The parkas, the hats, Nick's turtlenecks, it just wasn't working for me.

As for The Women Tell All, I didn't even watch. It's actually more entertaining to read all the various blogs and recaps that pop up almost as soon as the show is off the air in the Eastern and Central time zones. There was even a theme with the coverage: "What you didn't see" and note that there's some duplication in the stories. The reporters were all at the same taping, after all.

From The Hollywood Reporter: 17 Moments That Didn't Make It To Air, including the fact that Chris Harrison mixed up some of the contestants and Jasmine blamed Corinne's napping on her drinking. (I did too.) The article also states that the real reason the women were screaming at each other is that they were auditioning for Bachelor In Paradise, which fits with my ongoing belief that no one goes on this show to actually find love anymore. (Read it here.)

From Entertainment Tonight: 23 Things You Didn't See On TV, including a hug between Corinne and Taylor and that the taping actually takes about seven hours. (Read it here.)

From E! Online: The Craziest Moments You Didn't See On TV, including "Make Corinne Great Again" and "Vagine" T-shirts handed out by producers and the Corinne/Taylor feud went on even long than was shown during the show. (Read it here.)

Finally, barring a Dead Celebrity or a big Celebrity Divorce announcement, Nick and his new fiancee should be the main story on People magazine's cover next week. In the meantime, to tide us over until then, let's tiptoe through past cover stories featuring true love and Neil Lane engagement rings, starting with Jason M in 2009. What's most interesting to me is how similar the pictures are and how negative most of the headlines are. (Bachelor Betrayal! I Didn't Make A Mistake! I Am Not The Bad Guy!) Right now I'm guessing Nick's headline will read something like this: "Nick Proposes, But Will He Move To Canada?" (Or Arkansas.) We'll know in six days.

Jason Mesnick, 2009


Jake Pavelka, 2010


Brad Womack, 2011


I couldn't find a cover story for 2012 Bachelor Ben Flajnik; if I remember right he and Courtney got bumped for a last minute news story.

Sean Lowe, 2013


Juan Pablo, 2014


Chris Soules, 2015


Ben Higgins, 2016

Hoda Adopts A Baby

Issue dated March 20, 2017: Hoda Kotb


Hoda was on my list last week, but not one of the 25 potential stories in this week's Guessing Game post even got a sidebar. Bummer. The Afflecks' aren't getting a divorce? Gabourey Sidibe had surgery? Tarek is miserable during his divorce? Wow, who knew?

I admit I've been thinking about Hoda's adoption process. According to the story at people.com, Kotb worked with a licensed adoption agency in New York and was able to finalize the adoption in a matter of months. It sounds great but I wonder. Would a regular, non-famous unmarried 52-year old woman be able to find and adopt a healthy American newborn in a matter of months? Based on what I know about adoption, almost certainly not. My sense is that this lovely story could only happen to a rich, well-connected woman.

A Woman On A Horse

The Queen was out riding today, looking strong and healthy at the age of almost-91 (her birthday is April 21.) This picture is similar to ones I posted on June 1, 2015 (see it here) and on June 2, 2014 (see that one here.) Her Madge has a new coat, but best as I can tell it's the same horse and probably the same gentleman in attendance.

There are a lot of questions about the future of the British Monarchy in the next few years (When will Charles actually be King? Will Camilla get the title of Her Majesty the Queen? Will Prince Harry marry a half-black American actress and divorcee? Will Kate and William have another child? And what will Pippa's wedding dress look like?) For right now, however, the question "How's the Queen?" has only one answer: Just Fine, Thanks.

The Guessing Game

Tuesday morning, update #2:
Richard Simmons: Unseen for over 1,000 days, where is he?
Hugh Jackman: Cancer treatment
Paul Burrell: Princess Diana's butler comes out as gay, will be married soon
Casey Anthony: Gave an interview to the AP
Bill Paxton and/or George Michael: Causes of death announced, George's boyfriend speaks out

Monday afternoon, update #1: A couple more possibilities:
Chrissy Teigen: Writes about Postpartum Depression
Robert Osborne: Long-time host of Turner Classic Movies dies
Josh Gad: A gay moment in the new Beauty and the Beast
Jacqueline Watts: Missing (now dead) blonde woman

Original post:
What will be the cover story on the new issue of People magazine? My guesses, in no particular order:

Hunter Biden: A messy scandal featuring the former VP's younger son
Connie Britton: The death of Rayna Jaymes
DWTS: The new cast, including Bachelor Nick
April the Giraffe: Giving birth on camera
Tori Spelling: Her fifth child
Prince Harry and Meghan Markle: Getting engaged soon?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Quits The Apprentice, speaks about the affair
Ali Fedotowsky: Married
Kaitlyn Bristowe: Twitter feuding with Bach Creator Mike Fleiss
Natalie Portman: Gave birth
Shannen Doherty: Finished chemo treatments
Bristol Palin: Third baby will be a girl
Jack Schlossberg: Caroline Kennedy's son, announcing Profile in Courage award for Obama.
Susan Sarandon and Jessica Lange: Starring in Feuds
Julianne Hough: Bachelorette party

I'm posting a couple of days early because the list was getting long; I'll update the post if anything else pops up.

Blogging The Bach: Good-bye To Corinne

Finally, finally, we got to the post-Hometowns rose ceremony and Corinne was sent home in tears, some of which may not have been completely authentic. There was a weird vibe to the whole thing -- for all the supposed hotness of Nick's interactions with Corinne during the show, he seemed almost paternal as he hugged her good-bye, and it appeared to me as if Corinne was play-acting a bit in the limo afterwards, appearing to cry but also keeping a sharp eye on the camera. Since the episode aired she's been making the rounds, giving interviews all over the place and generally being famous. What's next for our girl Corinne? Bachelor Nation thinks she's a shoo-in for Bach In Paradise, but she's also talking about having her own show. Or being the next Bachelorette. Or going on Dancing With The Stars. (And she's up to 434,000 Insta followers.) I think it's safe to say, in the lexicon of Bachelor Nation, that she was never there for the right reasons. Building Brand Corinne was the goal all along and give the girl credit. It worked.



What about Nick? Is he there for the right reasons? There's talk in Bachelor Nation that he isn't. That what he really wants is to be an actor and/or model, and the whole "4th time's the charm" march through the Bachelor franchise, now followed by a turn on DWTS, is in service of that goal. (If his stilted convo with Andi is any indication, he's got a long way to go before the acting thing pays off.) Still, give the boy credit. He may never be a big movie star but he's gamed the system perfectly to build Brand Nick. By contrast, Luke Pell, who came in 4th on JoJo's season and came "this close" to being the Bachelor this time around, apparently couldn't get the "sincerely looking for love" thing going. In the six months or so since Nick was announced, Chris Harrison has said a couple of times in interviews that Luke lost the gig because he wasn't serious about finding love, that he was more interested in business opportunities and building his singer-songwriter career. No matter what your real goal might be, you have to at least pretend to be looking for love if you want to be The Bachelor.

There's actually been another "as famous as I want to be" narrative in Bachelor Nation this week, a little Twitter snit between former Bachelorette Kaitlyn Bristowe and Executive Producer/Show Creator Mike Fleiss. I posted some of the tweets in my previous post (read them here,) and subsequently Fleiss tweeted out a reminder that Melissa Rycroft had been on DWTS and won a mirror ball trophy, followed by original Bach'ette Trista reminding everyone that she's danced the dance too, way back on the first season of DWTS.

It's been fascinating to watch and I found myself wondering, what's really going on here? In particular I was surprised at the sarcastic tone of Kaitlyn's response to Fleiss:

@kaitlynbristowe has my total support if she wants to appear on DWTS!!! #TheBachelor

— Mike Fleiss (@fleissmeister) February 28, 2017

Thanks I'll get right on that opportunity 2 yrs ago. I wonder what changed your mind? 🙄 https://t.co/8QMr8XHsIO

— Kaitlyn Bristowe (@kaitlynbristowe) March 1, 2017

Is Kaitlyn mad that she didn't get the chance to dance? Clearly. Is she also mad that ABC apparently hasn't offered to televise (and pay for) a wedding for her and Shawn? Looks like it. Consider what she said to ET:

"My hope in speaking out is that future Bachelorettes are given the same opportunity as Bachelors," she said. "Whether it be a wedding, to dance, or another show. (Ben [Higgins] had the decision to do dancing or his own show.) Just to be treated the same -- to choose whatever will make them happy." (Read the story here.) 

Wouldn't you love to be a fly on the wall when ABC and Bachelor producers decide how to dole out the goodies? In addition to Trista and Melissa, Bachelors Jake, Sean and Chris were allowed to go on DWTS. Franchise couples Trista and Ryan, Jason and Molly, Ashley and J.P., Sean and Catherine and Jade and Tanner have all gotten free televised weddings. (Lacey and Marcus's Paradise wedding ceremony turned out to be a headfake. They never got a legal marriage license and are no longer together.) Sean co-hosted the BIP aftershow last year. Ben and Lauren starred in "Happily Ever After" and twins Emily and Haley will star in season two. Kaitlyn and Shawn have been together for two years. Why haven't they been given a TV wedding? No way to know, but Mike Fleiss is the king of Bachelor Nation. Snarking it out with him on Twitter probably isn't the way to get what you want.

Finally, how are the rest of the final four doing on Instagram? 

Vanessa 392,000

Raven 342,000

Rachel 247,000 

Get ready for Mondays, rosebuds, because there are not one but two three-hour Bach extravaganzas coming our way. This Monday we'll see the second half of the Fantasy Suites episode, followed by The Women Tell All. The following week is the finale episode, followed immediately by After The Final Rose. Meet me back here, same Bach time, same Bach channel. We're in the home stretch! 

Viola Davis

Issue dated March 13, 2017: Viola Davis



Viola Davis gets the main cover story, with a topline tease about the "Wildest Oscars Ever!" Dead Celebrity Bill Paxton is in the top right corner.